One Hell of a Bad Joke: One-Shot
by InsanityfortheSaneAcorn
Summary: The Mistress of Death is reborn as the daughter to the Prince of Hell and our favorite demon butler. Hell's Demon Princess who happens to be the Mistress of Death and somehow her father doesn't know? This sounds like one hell of a bad joke. Fem!Harry, Grey!Fem!Harry, MistressOfDeath!Fem!Harry. one-shot/separate story later
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Black Butler or Harry Potter.**

 **Author's Note: I don't know when I'll write this or if I will change the title, but think of this as a trailer of what is yet to come. This will be a One-shot for now.**

Death sure does have a twisted sense of humor. Personally, I think she's Just starved for entertainment. After practically being alone since the beginning of time, having to witness humanity's stupidity which always lead to their inevitable, not to mention spectacular, fiery demise, repeat itself numerous times over eons, can get boring.

But first, let me tell you my story, then I'll get back to the here and now, later.

In the beginning I was Alstroemeria Henrietta Potter. Fun name, huh?

I didn't think so. Most people couldn't even spell it, say it, so they just shortened it to Meria or Ally. My name was meant to be a way of naming me after my mother, Lily. Because the Alstroemeria is also called the Peruvian Lily or Lily of the Incas. I think the women in my family had some kind of flower fetish. I didn't understand why only the girls had to be named after flowers though... But I'm getting off topic.

After my parents were killed by a psychopathic megalomaniacal snake man when I was a child and only survivor. I was hailed a savior, for momentarily vaporizing the bastard. And what did that jerk Dumbledore do, locked me in the lion's den a.k.a. my psychotic aunt and whale uncle's house until I was 11, then I found out that I can do awesome shit and I was apparently a secret weapon in the upcoming war.

I'll skip over how I was almost killed every year at that bloody school and also expected to save people too. So, skip ahead a few years after finding all the hidden treasures on the hidden slices of soul scavenger hunt, then finally killing that fucker one and for all.

By the way, when I died in those woods, killing the final soul piece, which was in my head by the way, that's the first time I met death. She was smiling like a sugar crazed nut and welcomed me as her bloody Mistress. She told me, by dying, I activated the Deathly Hallows. Even if I didn't have the stone in my hand, I already used it before coming into the forest. Even if it was just to see the death, not raise it. Real smart, am I right? So, surprise bonus. Now I'm immortal.

Do you know what those sheep in the wizarding world did after they found that out? They got scared and labeled me the next dark lady! Me!

All my friends turned on me to. Ron was jealous of how powerful I had become since the battle of Hogwarts, Hermione took his side. The only friend I had that didn't abandon me, was Luna.

But not long after that magic started to wither away and eventually die out. I got to watch everyone I loved, grow up, live their lives and eventually die with family beside them.

But anyway, back to my situation, as 'The Mistress of Death'. And I know what you're thinking, 'What? Death is female?' Well… yes and no. Female is her favorite form to take. She said it gives her, and these are her words, 'the element of surprise on my unsuspecting victims.'

But really, it just depends on her mood, who she or he takes form as. She also looks 22 or 24 and acts like a mix between Tonks and Sirius. Which can be a fun and at the same time frightening combination.

"Wotcher Mistress!" death tackled me from behind, _'what ever happened to constant vigilance?'_

"What?" I ask dusting myself off and not turning around to face her.

"I had an idea about the next fun life you could be reincarnated into!"

 _'Oh god, death got an idea… this is going to bite me in the ass I just know it.'_

I turn around to look at her. She was rocking Tonks' signature short pink hair and punk style. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I could feel a headache coming on.

"Where I'm I am going next Liza?"

"An alternate universe, well in this world it's actually an anime called Kuroshitsuji or Black Butler. In their universe since you are my Mistress, you will be the big boss in charge of my little army of death gods. But trust me those guys are all business, no fun, well except a select few. But you would be born into that life and get to grow up again, but this time, instead of a witch, you would be the daughter to one of hell's princes." I open my mouth to ask a question, but she cuts me off and continues, _'man this woman doesn't take a breath.'_ "you would keep all your memories, magic, knowledge from your past life and still be about to summon me whenever." But what she didn't tell me is that if I summoned her only I or the minions of death could see her.

Unless she wanted other things or people to see her she'd let them. but no, she liked to fuck with me too much and didn't key me in on this little tidbit, plus some other things. before I knew she used her nail to rip open space time and pushed me into the vortex that led me to next life and fate.


	2. Chapter 2

p style="text-align: center;"strongThe official first chapter and Story is up of span style="text-decoration: underline;""One Hell of a Bad Joke: My Life"/span/strong/p  
p style="text-align: center;"strong Tell me what you think!/strong/p  
p style="text-align: center;"strongEnjoy :)/strong/p  
p style="text-align: center;"emstrongInsanity for the Sane Acorn/strong/em/p 


End file.
